Trust the Process of Life and Take Control

You have no reason to settle for what life gives you. Why not play an active role and take charge of your future?
Trust the Process of Life and Take Control
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 09 October, 2022

Trust the process of life! Even if it seems hard to believe, you’re right where you need to be. You’ve arrived at the perfect moment to decide for yourself and be who you really want to be.

People have a bad habit that’s hard to fix. We’re hopelessly nostalgic and obsessed about thoughts like: “I should do this,” “I have to do that,” “people expect me to…”

Little by little, we divide our mind into two parts: one focused on the past and the other obsessed with the future. All of this can make us fall into a never ending cycle of anxiety or depression. In this cycle, we focus so much on the “should’s” and “have to’s” that we clear the way for anxiety.

Let’s learn to take the power away from the past and the future. Let’s learn to fully live in the present and trust the process of life.

In this article, we’ll explain how to do this.

The best age is the one you’re at now

To accept what is happening to you, you have to be receptive. You need to appreciate who you are, what you’ve achieved, and everything that you have yet to achieve. Now, none of this will be possible if you aren’t first able to practice self-acceptance and self love.

One of the worst enemies of self-acceptance is not feeling good about your age. Some people carry this unease into other situations, and this can cause problems. We’re not just talking about feeling like needing surgery. We’re also referring to the disproportionate fear of getting wrinkles, your body changing etc.

We all certainly have the right to take care of ourselves and do everything we can to look good physically. However, what you have to do first is look good inside. The best age is always the one you’re at right now. Accept what you’ve gone through and know that your best opportunities are still to come in the process of life.

Learn how to flow: it’s the process of life

A row of women braiding hair.

The idea of “flow,” defined by psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi in 1975, isn’t always understood correctly. It’s not about going with the flow and seeing life as a dynamic entity that never stops with us as a part of it. It’s deeper and more interesting than that.

Flow is about:

  • Having certain clear vital objectives .
  • Being able to take on an activity or responsibility and enjoy it.
  • Being able to learn from our mistakes in order to become true experts.

Routine is dangerous, so it’s necessary to have small challenges and new things every day so that the process of flow will always be enriching.

The past is past: what matters is who you are now

The past does not define you. What defines you is how you interpret the past.

Here’s an example. Say your boyfriend left you three years ago and you were cheated on again a year ago. The last thing you should tell yourself is, “I don’t deserve to be loved.” A mature, brave person who knows how to properly interpret their past would say to themselves: “I need to choose my relationships better.”

I t is vital for your past to be your launching pad, a way to learn how to be better. Yesterday is no sofa to sit on and cry about everything you’ve gone through.

Read this, too: Brave are Those who Pick up Their Pieces and Rebuild Themselves

Sinister woman performing rituals.

Learn how to trust

Positive psychology was promoted in 1990 by psychologist Martin Seligman. He thought it was time to focus on the study of human behavior when it comes to well-being and how to give people tools to be happy.

One part was to understand and outline trauma, depression, and sadness. It was the ideal time for people to learn certain steps to take to encourage personal growth. One of these strategies is to learn how to trust in yourself and the fact that good things may appear at any time.

Now, it’s not about “hoping” and being passive and letting the days pass by until luck knocks on your door. You have to be an active person who puts your own processes of change into motion.

Keep people who bring you problems away. Stop the habits that discourage you. Make the changes your life needs.

Check this out too: 10 Habits to Live Happier

Woman in the process of life.

Overall, understand that even though you may be going through a hard time, getting out of this pit is within your reach. Today is the best time to try it. Right now is a wonderful time to start thinking more courageously and positively, which will lead to the creation of a new emotion.

That emotion will help you change and adopt a new attitude in the amazing process of life.

Try it! The results may surprise you.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

  • Seligman, M. E. P., & Csikszentmihalyi, M. (2014). Positive psychology: An introduction. In Flow and the Foundations of Positive Psychology: The Collected Works of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.