Practice Self-Love and You'll Be Loved as You Wish to Be

If you don't respect yourself, don't ask others to respect you. Love yourself so that others will love you as you wish. Because you deserve to stop suffering and finally be happy.
Practice Self-Love and You'll Be Loved as You Wish to Be
Valeria Sabater

Written and verified by psychologist Valeria Sabater.

Last update: 27 May, 2022

Those who make the mistake of measuring what they deserve in terms of the love they receive from others can suffer many disappointments. Therefore, love yourself as you deserve so that others will love you that way. In other words, practice self-love. Keep reading to find out more.

Imagining that we deserve what we’ve received can be a mistake. Imagine if throughout your life you’ve received false affection or an affection inhabited by pain and manipulation, you could come to believe that you don’t deserve to be truly loved. These are very complex and destructive situations for which no one has prepared us.

In fact, it’s interesting to see how in school children are taught to locate where the main capitals of the world are located but no one offers them strategies to learn to love themselves. To take care of themselves as the exceptional beings that they are and that, without a doubt, deserve the best.

We invite you to reflect on this and to put into practice the healthy exercise of loving ourselves and, in turn, teach these same strategies to the little ones.

You might like: Self-Love 101: How to Love Yourself

No One Deserves Your Attention as Much as You Do

Society often teaches us values that can turn out to be a double-edged sword: self-love. Loving the reflection in the mirror is sometimes seen as egotistical. Cultural values teach us to be thankful, let people exit a room before we enter, help thy neighbor, give everything for those we love, etc.

It’s true that all these may be honorable actions that we shouldn’t stop practicing. However, we should also teach ourselves to practice self -love and to have integrity and high  self-esteem.

A woman holding a yellow flower.

Don’t measure your worth based on what you receive

Imagine that a child was bullied at school. Now imagine this child is always alone at home. She doesn’t receive the appropriate affection and attention from her parents.

Now, imagine this same child as an adult. Additionally, think about her efforts to maintain happy emotional, mature, and enriching relationships. If she doesn’t achieve this, she will probably end up that she’s a person who doesn’t deserve to be loved. Even though this seems harsh, many people have experiences like this.

It’s true that having a traumatic childhood doesn’t definitely mean that we’ll have negative emotional relationships. However, it’s a factor that bears considerable weight when determining the quality of our future relationships.

How to Practice Self-Love

  • Don’t measure your worth based on what you receive from others.
  • Love yourself every day like you deserve and don’t wait for others to give you what you’ve been waiting for.
  • Don’t seek constant approval for your actions and thoughts. You’re your own judge. That’s right, you’re the person who must give life, support, and effort in every action you decide to carry out.
  • If your childhood and teenage years were not happy times in your life, try to separate the past from the present. You already know what it means to grow up without healthy, stable, and affectionate love. Therefore, leave this in the past and know the future is brighter.
  • Heal your wounds by practicing self-love. Pamper yourself and protect yourself from things that could harm you, but also embark on new paths that lead to the hope of becoming better each day. You’ll attract the attention you think you deserve.

You deserve a lot more than what some people give you

Sometimes we simply don’t give up on people when we should. Despite not being exactly happy with a certain relationship, we say to ourselves, “That’s life! I’m not gonna find anything better and this is better than being alone.”

  • Whether we want this or not, emotional stagnation clings to this implicit and subtle suffering that undermines our self-esteem.

Unfortunately, we get used to emptiness, regret, contempt, and even unhappiness. This is something dangerous, given that we lose everything when defeatism creeps into our life.

Love yourself and let go of what hurts you

A woman smiling to herself in nature.

You deserve a lot more than what some people give you. Whether you believe it or not, this is because there are some people who don’t know how to love others and who don’t understand what reciprocity is, which are the two cornerstones of sincere love. This type of person doesn’t worry about or make an effort to bring smiles instead of tears to the relationship.

You might like: 7 Ways to Love Your Life

You shouldn’t get involved in these types of relationships. Love should bring joy, not sorrow. Be brave and leave behind the pain you’ve experienced so that you can get back your integrity.

Integrity means f inding a link between what we deserve, what we feel, and what we do in our daily lives. In other words, it’s a balance between mind, heart, and action.

Really love yourself like you deserve to be love, even if you have to spend some time alone for a while. This option will always be better than living with someone who hurts you.

You’re a wonderful person who deserves the best in life. Fight for this, fight for yourself, and fight for those you love. Continue to practice self-love so you never settle for less than you deserve. And, above all, love yourself!

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.