Low Self-Esteem: When You're Your Own Worst Enemy

Low self-esteem plunges us into a state of discomfort from which it's sometimes difficult to escape. However, it's possible with patience and willpower. Find out how!
Low Self-Esteem: When You're Your Own Worst Enemy

Last update: 27 May, 2022

Low self-esteem affects us negatively in all parts of our lives. It’s as if we were wearing glasses that obscure everything, that keep us from realizing how valuable we are and that little by little, turn us into our worst enemies.

Thus, the person who lives under the mantle of low self-esteem is without illusions, they don’t feel capable and worthy. They can’t find a sparkle in their eyes when they look at themselves in the mirror. This is because they’ve stopped believing in themselves. They can change it though.

Let’s take a closer look.

Low self-esteem can paralyze you

Self-esteem is very important for your overall well-being. It’s one of the fundamental pieces that build the road to happiness. Thus, loving oneself is essential to feel good because it’s the shield that protects you from threats and pain.

Thus, when you fail to do so when you forget about yourself and delve into the depths of self-loathing, the discomfort will inevitably appear. And so, little by little you lose desire, your illusions extinguish and you begin to boycott yourself in this scenario.

A woman looking down.

Low self-esteem has a highly paralyzing power. It can trap and immobilizing your routine. It becomes hard to get up, you will feel vulnerable, insecure, and without initiative.

Then, you become defensive in the face of any comment. Thus, you’ll end up depressed if this goes on for a while. It’s for this reason that’s important to learn to manage those moments when your strength falters and you stop believing in yourself.


The opinions that affect you

One of the first things that can trigger self-esteem is the value you place on other peoples’ opinions of you. These are thoughts and ideas about how other people observe their surroundings and yet we sometimes give them too much weight.

The worst thing you can do is take their opinions to heart because this can lead to unnecessary suffering. Why do you give so much importance to other people’s opinions though? Well, because you’ve been taught to seek others’ approval.


For example, the habit of seeking the approval of others, of receiving positive opinions that indicate you’re doing well. Or simply valuing the opinion of certain people above your own because it fulfills a series of characteristics.

Suddenly, the conception we have of ourselves changes and we attribute it to ourselves when others criticize some aspect of our behavior. Thus, our self-esteem levels reduce.

Ideally, you must analyze your thoughts and see things in perspective in order not to be influenced by the opinions of others. At least, you shouldn’t allow them to contaminate your self-perception.

Keep in mind that you’re not always right and that your negative emotions can cloud reality.

You don’t have to be your own worst enemy


A woman hugging a pillow.

Find out how to Be Yourself and Be Happy

As you’ve seen, it’s possible to wind up becoming your own worst enemy. You assume that everything you see and hear is true and you turn against yourself.

What can you do to stop this cycle? Is there any way to boost your self-esteem? Let’s review some simple tips that you can put into practice today!

  • Try to be more assertive
  • Give yourself time
  • Exercise
  • Be realistic about your goals
  • Appreciate your qualities
  • Do constructive criticism
  • Never compare yourself to others
  • Be kind and loving with yourself
  • Be aware of your limitations

Investing in self-love is key to well-being. However, remember this is a time-consuming task, especially if you’ve put up too many barriers.

In this case, seek the help of a professional in the field. This is because therapy can help you establish guidelines and improve the way you see things. Thus, don’t be afraid to ask for advice when you need it.

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

  • Pereira, M. (2007). Autoestima : un factor relevante en la vida de la persona y tema escencial del proceso educativo. Revista Electrónica “Actualidades Investigativas En Educación.” https://doi.org/10.15517/aie.v7i3.9296
  • V. Del Barrio, Victoria; D. Frías ;V. Mestre Escrivá, M. V. (1994). Autoestima y depresión en niños. Revista de Psicología General y Aplicada. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1474-919X.2009.01001.x
  • Ferreras, E. (2007). La autoestima. Anales de Mecánica y Electricidad. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.medin.2012.12.011
  • Vazquez, A., Jimenez, R., & Vasquez-Morejon, R. (2004). Escala de autoestima de Rosenberg. Apuntes de Psicologia. https://doi.org/http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.biochi.2007.09.002
  • Navarro, E., Tomás, J. M., & Oliver, A. (2006). Factores personales, familiares y académicos en niños y adolescentes con baja autoestima. Boletín de Psicología.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.