5 Reasons Why Unhappy Couples Stay Together
Written and verified by the philosopher Isbelia Esther Farías López
There is a high percentage of unhappy couples all over the world. The paradox is that almost all of these people can give their friends advice to break up when they share their relationship problems with them.
Almost all of us have this type of couple in our circle of friends. Nobody knows how they can stay together despite endless arguments and constant disrespect.
What do we consider an unhappy couple?
Arguments are the basis of your ‘communication’
Each word, each gesture or pose of one partner quickly leads to a fight. There comes a time when they only talk to start an argument or to place blame. This is a waste of energy for them and for those around them who keep wondering why they are still together.
It’s impossible to maintain a dialogue because they always focus on something their partner did wrong. It doesn’t matter if it’s in public or in private, they are just in the habit of communicating this way.
Lies and infidelity have taken over the relationship
One or both partners live behind a wall of lies. Even cheating is so common that everyone knows, but they still will not end the relationship.
Respect and trust seem to have no place in their relationship. They know that’s the case and, because of that, they suffer the consequences of it in silence.
Generally, unhappy couples can’t meet their own goals or can’t agree on what they want in the future. Then, one of partner becomes resentful and this grudge will continue causing issues in the relationship.
You lose interest in your partner’s achievements because he is following his own path at a totally different pace and without consideration for what you want.
Everyone can point out unhappy couples that are still together, but today we will try to understand why they do it.
Unhappy couples stay together and the reasons are inside of them
1. Family mandate or ignorant pride
Many families encourage their children to marry for life. Implicitly, one must then tolerate everything that happens in their relationship so that they don’t ruin family name with a separation. You can’t go back on your decision once you have decided to be together.
Although it may seem dated, many unhappy couples are still together out of the fear of disappointing their families.
Others, on the other hand, feel that they have fought so hard to for their relationship that they can’t afford to break up. They know that their parents were right, that their partner wasn’t right for them, but their pride is more important than their happiness.
2. Fear of being left alone
Loneliness is a ghost that scares many people. So, there are those who choose to continue with their boring and sad life because they think it’s better than spending time alone.
That fear works like a barrier that keeps them from looking beyond what is in front of them. They do not even allow themselves to think that there might be other people out there waiting to make them happy.
3. Children need a family, whatever it is
One of the most serious mistakes that couples make is to stay together because they have children. They think that staying all under one roof guarantees happy children, and they are responsible for making that happen.
That couldn’t be further from the truth. Children will be happy as long as their parents are happy too. Growing up in a hostile environment, full of fights, makes for a terrible childhood.
4. The time invested in the relationship has its price
Some people are convinced that the years they have dedicated to the relationship, and the money they have put into it, justify making the effort to stay together. If they have put that much effort into keeping the relationship going, it wouldn’t be fair to end it, despite how tedious their day-to-day life can be.
Also, it’s painful to think that they have lost so much time in their lives, just to end up separating. And so, they choose to face the future without making any changes toward a better life.
5. Emotional or economic dependence wins all of the battles
In toxic relationships, people who depend too much on their partner, both emotionally or economically. They don’t even let themselves imagine the idea of separating from them. They know that they’re unhappy in their relationship, but think that they wouldn’t survive a break-up.
For example, if, at the beginning of the relationship, the couple decided that one partner would work and the other would take care of the household chores, the couple may be afraid to end things. The fear of starting over with a new lifestyle, reinserting oneself in the labor and social market, could make the idea of breaking up impossible to think about.
Reflection
Unhappy couples stay together for various reasons that most people around them can’t understand. Maybe their closest friends try to talk to them about their issues and attempt to give them advice, but the truth is that only the couple can work to change the situation.
There are those who resort to professional help to improve their relationship or to make the right decisions. And others who don’t do anything, they just live their life hoping that the future will be better.
This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.
