73 Questions to Get to Know Your Friends Better
Friendship is one of the greatest gifts we can have in life. Your relationship with a friend is different from your relationship with your partner, neighbors, colleagues, or acquaintances. Because you can always strengthen your connection with them, here are 73 questions to help you get to know your friends better.
It’s not uncommon for us to overlook many aspects of our friends’ lives. Sometimes we take things for granted or simply forget to dig a little deeper. We’re sure that through the following questions to get to know your friends better, you’ll be able to discover things you didn’t know about them.
Questions to get to know your friends better
Experts agree that friendship is good for your health. The support, companionship, and help, that a friend can offer you translates into mental stability, less loneliness, higher self-esteem, and a sense of purpose in life. This is why researchers recommend that older adults maintain their friendships.
To access all these benefits and at the same time consolidate a lasting relationship, it’s important to make a deeper connection with your friends. This involves strengthening the bonds of communication, which will allow you to learn more about them.
Here are some questions to help you get to know your friends better.
1. How do you prefer to be comforted when you’re sad?
This is a very important question to ask so you’ll know what to do and what not to do the next time your friend is sad.
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2. What has made you the most proud?
Generally speaking, of course. We all have things that make us proud. These may range from those that we’ve achieved on our own (a college degree, for example) to those that involve others (a family).
3. What has made you most ashamed?
This is the other side of the coin to the previous question. Just as there are things that make us proud, there are also things that make us ashamed. A true friendship should be aware of both.
4. What’s your greatest fear?
Fear of ending up alone in life, losing one’s parents, and death are some of the most common.
5. Do you believe there’s life after death?
One of the questions to get to know your friends better will allow you to inquire into their spiritual beliefs. At the very least, it’s a question that will make for an interesting conversation!
6. Where do you see yourself in five years?
Knowing your future projections is also part of building friendships with the people in your circle. You can also up the ante and ask about how they see themselves in 10 and 20 years.
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7. What’s your favorite food?
You may already know their favorite food, or at least you may think you do. Be sure to ask this question, however. You’re in for a surprise!
8. Is there anything you’ve done in the past that you regret?
Of course the answer will be yes, since we’ve all done or said something we regret.
9. What would you consider unforgivable?
A betrayal? A lie? Hypocrisy? There are many things that are unforgivable for each person, and knowing this is very useful when building a friendship.
10. What makes you feel inspired?
What gives them a dose of creativity and allows them to give their all to a project? For some, it’s music. For others, it’s meditation. Everyone has their own means of inspiration.
11. What do you think is the greatest part of a friendship?
There are many ingredients for a healthy friendship. Respect, communication, empathy, and fidelity are some of them.
12. What are your short and medium term goals right now?
We’ve already mentioned in previous questions to get to know your friends better the idea of long-term goals. However, it’s a good idea to ask about short- and medium-term goals too. Maybe you can actively do something to help make them happen!
13. What makes you laugh?
Knowing what makes your friends laugh will help you create fun moments that you can all share. Humor is a great tool for bringing people together.
14. What one thing have you made a habit of in your daily life?
Positive things, of course! Habits make us who we are, so they define our personality.
15. What’s your idea of happiness?
Happiness is for many people the ultimate achievement in life. If you know what makes your friends happy, you can help them find things that bring them joy.
16. What about success?
Success is another of the great paradigms in modern life. The definition of success your friends have can help you to positively value the achievements they consider as such.
17. Do you believe in any conspiracy theory?
Nowadays, there are thousands and thousands of conspiracy theories, so some of your friends likely believe at least one of them. Like other get-to-know-your-friends questions, this can make for hours of interesting conversation!
18. What do you think a perfect day would be like?
Since our tastes and ideas about perfection are different, what we consider a perfect day is also different.
19. Is there anything you used to believe in but now have given up?
We’re constantly changing our minds about what we think and do. Wouldn’t it be extraordinary if your friends have changed ideals or beliefs that they used to follow?
20. Who do you admire most in the world?
We all have role models. They may be people were who have achieved great things, or people we respect for what they represent or their ideas. If you really want to get closer to your friends, you need to know who that person is and what they mean to them.
21. Do you have any phobias?
Phobias are described as irrational fears. They can develop towards anything from cheese (turophobia) to the color yellow (xanthophobia).
22. What one thing do you feel like have to achieve in your life?
A child, a stable marriage, lots of money, a house and health are some of the most sought sought-after answers.
23. What is the most traumatic experience you’ve had?
Anything that put your life at risk or at least took you to the extreme works here. Knowing this kind of story is one of the objectives of the questions to get to know your friends.
24. What’s your favorite series and movie?
The rise of streaming entertainment services has made us all have a favorite series and movie. You can make an open-ended list in which you both include your best titles.
25. If money were no object for you, what would you buy?
The first thing they mention may actually be your friend’s true desire. However, by posing hypothetical scenarios like this, you can learn something you didn’t know about him.
26. What’s the luckiest thing that’s ever happened to you?
Sometimes, luck finds us all at once and coincidences go beyond the limits of logic. Surely your friend will have an anecdote of this type.
27. How do you value your relationship with your parents?
With this question, you can learn what they really think of them and how prosperous their relationship is right now.
28. What do you hate the most in life?
Whatever makes you feel most uncomfortable, or that awakens negative feelings in you fits for this answer. It doesn’t have to be big things. Little things are okay too. For example, walking behind someone who’s very slow or washing dishes count!
29. Is there anything you consider too serious to joke about?
We mentioned in the questions to get to know your friends better above that humor is useful for building relationships. However, it’s good to know the line you shouldn’t cross with them. Dark or racist humor can offend rather than make them laugh.
30. How much do you know about cooking?
If the answer is very little, then maybe you can teach them a trick or two. If your kitchen skills are also poor, the two of you can learn together. Cooking class, anyone?
31. Do you have stage fright?
This is a question that may seem trivial but could save your friend a few embarrassments by not putting them in a situation where they have to speak in public.
32. What activity would you say you enjoy most in company?
Watching a movie? Playing sports? Hiking through the mountains? Playing video games? This is a great question to get to know future activities together.
33. Do you think you have your life together?
The answer is most likely no for many of us, so if it is, try to find out why. After all, no matter how stable our life is, it’s impossible to be 100% content with it.
34. What do you miss most about being a kid?
Childhood is one of the most missed stages of life. Wouldn’t it be interesting to know what your best friend misses the most about his childhood?
35. Do you consider yourself to be a superstitious person?
This is another question to get to know your friends better that serves as an introduction to an interesting conversation.
36. Do you consider yourself a competitive person?
And, if so, what’s the best example of a competitive attitude in your life?
37. Is there a hidden talent that I don’t know about?
A talent is a skill or ability that, without much practice, is exceptional. Everyone has a talent, we just sometimes choose to hide it.
38. Do you have a bad habit you’d like to leave behind?
Maybe you can help them leave it in the past. Quitting smoking, respecting sleep hours, or not procrastinating are some examples.
39. What’s your favorite video game?
We’re living in the heyday of the video game industry, so knowing which title in particular attracts your friend will serve to connect on the virtual planet with them.
40. What do you think about fashion?
This is another of the seemingly naive questions that can tell you more than you think. For example, it can help you know how to choose a gift you want to give them or recommend something.
41. What do you think of today’s society?
In general, of course. The customs, the values, progress, and so on are all good topics here.
42. Do you think the future of society is promising?
Again, this is a question that can be used to have a deep conversation. By itself, this question can lead to many more questions that can allow you to talk about what you think the future will be like for both of you.
43. Do you wish you were born in a different time?
If so, what time? Why? What role would you play in it? Hypothetical situations are a great way to ask questions to get to know your friends better.
44. What’s your favorite book?
If you’re both fans of reading, this is the place to exchange your favorite books and authors.
45. What’s your favorite social network?
Maybe you already know, but it’s worth asking!
46. Is there anything that makes you daydream?
What are the things that produce a real fantasy in your waking life? It can be ideas, sensations, thoughts, books, movies, or even reactions.
47. What do you think I should know about you as your friend?
This is one of the basic questions to get to know your friends better that you can’t fail to ask. Yes, it’s very direct, but sometimes this is the best way to avoid beating around the bush and connect with them.
48. How would you rate your current life from 1 to 10?
One is very bad and ten is great. What number would they give their life?
49. What do you think about politics?
For many people, politics is a fertile ground for conversation. However, others simply ignore it. Knowing what your partner’s political convictions are can make you reserve or bet on certain ideas when you talk.
50. What do you do to relax?
Some people do meditation, others do yoga. There are those who listen to music and also those who prefer to connect with nature. What’s their trick?
51. Do you value intelligence or appearance more?
This is a classic question that you can’t help but ask to know more about your friend.
52. Is there a particular scent that you like?
If so, why do you like it? The answer can guide you to future presents or surprises of any kind!
53. Is there anything you’re too old for, but still do?
Too old in the eyes of society, of course. (Or at least maybe a part of it).
54. What song can’t you help but sing along to every time you hear it?
Knowing their musical tastes is another thing you can get from asking questions to get to know your friends better.
55. Do you believe in love at first sight?
For some people love at first sight is a myth, while others think it’s a meaningless ideal. However, many people do believe in love at first sight.
56. What things do you usually do on the weekends?
This is a recommended question to get to know a person when your friendship has just started.
57. What are the three most important things in your life right now?
Material things, like objects. A video game console, a piece of jewelry, or a childhood toy…It could be anything! To use another hypothetical situation, ask them to think about the things they would rescue first in a fire.
58. What makes a normal day immediately turn into a great day?
As with other get-to-know-your-friends questions, the answer can be used to your advantage to surprise your friend in the future.
59. What motivates you to keep going when you fail at something?
Knowing this, you can remind them of it the next time they stumble. A helping hand is always a great part of having a friend.
60. Do you consider yourself to be a thrifty person?
Saving is very important in adult life, so this is another question you can use to get to know him or her better.
61. What object would you like to have in your life right now?
We’ve already mentioned a question to find out three objects that are special to him or her. Now you can ask about what material thing he or she would like to have right now.
62. Is there anything in particular thing that increases your stress levels?
Stress catalysts vary from person to person. How they respond to it, too. Knowing this can help you avoid exposing them to certain stressful moments.
63. Would you say that you’re a patient person?
This is another answer whose content you can apply in a practical way to your friendship relationship.
64. Do you believe in second chances?
If so, under what conditions?
65. How do you feel about forgiveness?
This is a question that connects with the previous one, as well as other questions to get to know your friends better. In many friendships, forgiveness is a key part of maintaining the relationship.
66. If you were elected president, what one thing would you like to change about the country?
This is a question you can skip if your friend has already stipulated that he or she doesn’t like politics, of course. Although, come to think of it, it’s still a hypothetical situation…
67. If you could change your name, what name would you choose?
You can also ask him/her about a nickname or a shortening of his/her first name that suits him/her better.
68. Do you consider yourself a jealous person?
Jealousy is a feeling that is not only expressed in a relationship, but in any kind of relationship. It’s important to know this about someone.
69. What’s the strangest thing on your bucket list?
This is not necessarily what you most want to achieve, but what’s far from the norm on this type of list.
70. Do you consider yourself an intelligent person?
This is another great question to get to know your close friends better. Although you might think otherwise, many intelligent people don’t consider themselves as such.
71. What makes you cry?
With this question, you can also ask about what things they do when they cry.
72. What would you like to say to your past self?
We con’t change the past, but we can recreate scenarios of this type that allow us to reflect.
73. What do you think of me?
We’d like to end our questions to get to know your friends better with the only one on our list that refers to you. Knowing what your friends think of you is also important!
We hope you find the questions we’ve chosen helpful in connecting with your friends. Don’t feel obligated to stick to the questions mechanically. Try to make it a natural exercise. Also, don’t be afraid to ask parallel questions based on their answers!It might interest you...
All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.
- Lu, P., Oh, J., Leahy, K. E., & Chopik, W. J. (2021). Friendship importance around the world: Links to cultural factors, health, and well-being. Frontiers in Psychology, 3568. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.570839/full
- Selfhout, M., Denissen, J., Branje, S., & Meeus, W. (2009). In the eye of the beholder: perceived, actual, and peer-rated similarity in personality, communication, and friendship intensity during the acquaintanceship process. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 96(6), 1152. https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0014468
- Mayo Clinic. (2022). Las amistades: Enriquecen tu vida y mejoran tu salud. Consultado el 26 de octubre de 2023. https://www.mayoclinic.org/es/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/friendships/art-20044860