How to Keep the Passion Alive in a Relationship

Monotony, among other factors, often affect co-existence in relationships. Luckily, there are ways to keep the passion alive. Read this article to discover them!
How to Keep the Passion Alive in a Relationship
Isbelia Esther Farías López

Written and verified by the philosopher Isbelia Esther Farías López.

Last update: 26 May, 2022

If you analyze the data on the number of divorces around the world, you’ll realize that they’re quite alarming. Therefore, it’s important to know how to keep the passion alive in a relationship in order to avoid a painful breakup.

We know that married life can have its ups and downs. However, it’s both partners’ responsibility to keep the passion alive.

That’s why we decided to share a series of recommendations to ensure the wonderful dating stage doesn’t end when you start living together. On the contrary, they’ll help keep your love alive.

The main reasons why passion dies

In principle, it’s important to know the main reasons why passion dies in relationships. Some of them are:

  • Monotony – the relationship is predictable and there are no surprises
  • You don’t do anything exciting, always the same activities
  • Both of you fell in love quickly and didn’t take the necessary time to really get to know each other or determine if one of you was only filling a void from a previous relationship
  • You feel that you want someone better than your partner because you feel that they’re not meeting your expectations or you aren’t willing to get more involved in the relationship
  • You got involved with someone else and lost control. It could be a co-worker or someone close, and this is distancing you from your partner
  • Sex isn’t pleasurable and you do it just out of obligation, not because you feel passion. It’s just the sex act, with no intimate caresses and loving touches.
A couple arguing.

Many factors affect passion in a relationship. Some of the most common include monotony, infidelity, and sexual dissatisfaction.

How to keep the passion alive in a relationship

If you analyzed the causes and noticed that one of them may be happening to you, the decision you make will decide the way the relationship goes. But, if you feel that it’s just boredom, monotony, and excess routine, then there are keys that can help you keep the passion alive in your relationship. Apply them!

Communication

The main thing is to communicate with your partner regarding how you’re feeling. Relationships often go south because there’s no communication. Don’t talk about common topics such as chores, the groceries, work issues, and your children’s homework (if you have children). For example, you should talk about your favorite songs or the plot of a popular movie.

Discover: When Your Partner Wants to End Your Relationship, but You Don’t

Daily gestures

To keep the passion alive, thoughtful touches are important. Small tokens of affection can revive the feeling of affection and love.

Avoid distractions

Don’t be on your phones or computers 24/7. You should devote time to each other and forget all other obligations or outstanding issues for a while. Try to end your work tasks when your workday ends and avoid using harmful technologies.

Praise each other

Many couples forget to devote time to their appearance to delight their partner, like they did when they were dating. Other couples never compliment each other. Keep in mind that you can make your partner happy with simple compliments or praise.

A couple kissing in bed.

Flattery is very important in keeping the passion alive, as it helps make your partner feel special.

Fix emotional wounds quickly

If you want to keep the passion alive in your relationship, never stop talking to each other, never sleep in separate rooms, communicate, and, if necessary, say “sorry”. Don’t let your attitude make your partner’s heart go cold. Having a hostile attitude is destructive.

Have fun in bed to keep the passion alive

Doing erotic dances, wearing spicy outfits, blindfolding each other, and even applying cream or chocolate to each other’s bodies and licking it off erotically…there are so many things you can do with a bit of imagination! Take the initiative. Don’t expect your partner to always do it! Surprise them in bed.

Discuss your sexual preferences

Show your partner how you want them to caress you, tell them what your pleasure points are, and whisper to them all those naughty things you’d like to try out. This will surely send your partner wild for you.

It’s not all about the actual sex act. When in bed, the important thing is to kiss and caress each other, talk, or look into each other’s eyes.

You don’t want to miss this article: Seven Common Sex Mistakes Men Make

Surprise your partner

Seduce them in the kitchen, or sneak into the shower to surprise them. Having sex in other places is exciting.

Follow these recommendations to rekindle the passion with your partner, even if you’ve been living together for many years.


All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.


  • Relación entre satisfacción sexual, ansiedad y prácticas sexuales. (2010). Pensamiento Psicológico7(14), 41–52. https://doi.org/10.11144/130
  • Barón, M. J. O., Zapiain, J. G., & Apodaca, P. (2002). Apego y satisfacción afectivo-sexual en la pareja. Psicothema14(2), 469–475.
  • Paredes, J. (2009). Imagen Corporal Y Satisfaccion Sexual. Ajayu7, 28–47.
  • Villanueva Orozco Gerardo Benjamín Tonatiuh, Rivera Aragón Sofía, Díaz Loving Rolando, Reyes-Lagunes Isabel. La comunicación en pareja: desarrollo y validación de escalas. Acta de investigación psicol  [revista en la Internet]. 2012  Ago [citado  2019  Oct  30] ;  2( 2 ): 728-748. Disponible en: http://www.scielo.org.mx/scielo.php?script=sci_arttext&pid=S2007-48322012000200010&lng=es.

This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.