4 Ways to Overcome Infidelity Successfully
Infidelity is one of the most complicated situations to overcome in a relationship. Here is a circumstance where the trust you placed in your partner has been broken.
Many people are unfaithful by nature, while others aren’t able to be honest with their partner to convey their need for an open relationship. Regardless of the cause, the person who suffers is the one who has been faithful and has now been disappointed.
Although you suffer in such a situation, the bigger problem that arises is how to deal with and overcome infidelity in the best way possible. What you cannot do is continue to pick at the wound.
4 important aspects to overcome infidelity
1. A pain that never ends
When infidelity occurs in a couple, it’s important to talk about it, and it’s a requirement that the person who was unfaithful be honest at all times. The truth has already been missing, so now it’s critical that they don’t lie any more.
Although you’ll be in pain and want answers, asking for them may not help you. Just don’t do what many people do: cover up the pain and ignore it.
The saying “eyes that do not see, heart that does not feel” couldn’t be further from the truth. There is nothing to pretend, nothing to ignore and you can’t move on as if nothing has happened.
Your pain will resurface one day when you least expect it, no matter how much you bury it. You’re only delaying the inevitable. Now is the time to make decisions, even if it’s too painful.
2. You need to be honest about your relationship
Some couples manage to recover their relationship after infidelity, but not all are the same. When someone has broken the bond of trust that was there, you need to ask yourself some questions.
Will you be able to forgive something like this? Could you continue to sleep next to that person?
Be honest with yourself, because lots of people will answer “yes” to those questions, but never put to rest the daily attacks and reproaches toward their partner.
Perhaps a temporary separation will help you clarify the ideas and see everything in better perspective. Perhaps if the infidelity was a “one night stand” it doesn’t matter so much, but if it was more of a double relationship other measures need to be taken.
One of the possibilities you could look into is couples therapy. This is only an option if there is no hatred between you and no recrimination. You must go into it with love and the desire for reconciliation.
3. There is life after your partner
Infidelity can break you apart inside. You believe that you can never overcome this huge disappointment, but you know what? You’re wrong.
This situation is just another stage;a hard one, it’s true, but one from which you can come out stronger if you face it in the right way.
Love will be the main incentive that will lead you to want to resolve this situation and be together again.
Signs of Being in a Toxic Relationship
If you feel that there is no solution or you don’t even want to find one, then there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Life doesn’t end with this partner. There is plenty of life’s path left to go, many people to know and many experiences to live.
4. Never pay with the same coin
Some people think they’ll feel better if they make the other person feel the same suffering that they did. To do this, they try to inflict the same damage.
Maybe you will forgive your partner just to be unfaithful, so they’ll know how you felt. Perhaps, as soon as you end your relationship, you start dating someone new just to make them jealous or to think you never cared about them.
Do you even realize what you’re doing by acting this way? It won’t make you feel better, and it might not even affect the person who used to be your partner.
What you’re doing is behaving in a manner that will make you unhappy and compound the pain you already feel even more.
Cry, talk, go out with your friends, lean on all the people who love you and let it out, but don’t go do things that you’ll regret.
You can always overcome infidelity, although the first time it will hurt you with a much greater intensity. Don’t simmer in your pain. Look ahead and be happy.
If you overcome infidelity, you’ll get another experience to learn from, regardless of the outcome with respect to your partner.
All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.
- Camacho, J. “Fidelidad e infidelidad en las relaciones de pareja.” Buenos Aires (2004).
- Muñiz, Sánchez, and Mónica Parada. Recursos utilizados en la relación de pareja que ayudan a superar la crisis producida por infidelidad. BS thesis. Universidad de la Sabana, 2012.
- Ontaneda Puente, María Carolina. Factores que facilitan que una pareja pueda superar una infidelidad. BS thesis. Quito: USFQ, 2016, 2016.
- Varela, M. (2014). Estudio sobre infidelidad en la pareja: Análisis de contenido de la literatura. Alternativas en Psicología, 30, 36–49.