Tips and Advice on How to Love without Pain
There are many people who decide to give up on love simply because they don’t want to get hurt again. Traumatic experiences from the past can make you do this. But we invite you to be brave and try again.
Love without pain
Every sentimental and affective relationship implies a certain dosage of pain. In some way, this is understandable. Many feelings, emotions, and even your own personal balance come into play.
But many couples establish lasting and healthy relationships, where happiness and everyday comfort prevail and both partners support each other unconditionally. Why not aim for that?
There may have been difficult times in your life, but we assure you that love is something that is always worth the risk. But you should know how to protect yourself and control a few basic dimensions to always keep your self-esteem in check. Take note of the following tips on how to love without pain.
1. Know yourself well
This may seem nonspecific and vague. But it’s necessary to know yourself well in order to establish a stable and mature relationship. Do you know what your limits are? What would you never be willing to do or support? What has hurt you the most?
There are people who allow their own values to get broken and let their personal limits get crossed. So much so, that their self-esteem becomes affects.
You should be clear about what you like and don’t like. Start a relationship maturely and safely. “I know who I am and I’m not going to let anyone destroy my integrity.”
2. Have a relationship to be happy, not to cry
Be clear on one thing: people keep relationships going to be happy and to establish a compromise that gives continuity and enriches both partners. If you start to realize at one moment that there are more tears than smiles, you should start to reevaluate certain things.
Learn more here: 6 Keys to a Successful Relationship
Also, you should keep in mind that there are few things as intense in life as feeling loved and loving someone. It’s something that’s worth the effort. Everyone deserves second chances, and people who are worth it will know how to truly make you wake up every day with a smile.
3. Always be yourself, don’t let yourself change
You know who you are. You know that you’re good at many things and that you’re brave, capable, and have many relatives and friends who love you. Your own self-esteem and social circle show you who you are and the virtues you have.
If the person you like or are in love with puts your self-esteem down or undervalues you, don’t stay with them. You should stay away from people who threaten your personality and make you feel inferior. Two people come together to learn about one another, enjoy, laugh, share, and grow. Once you don’t feel like yourself, run.
But if your partner values you as you are and loves you for your virtues and your faults, don’t lose them. And we assure you that there are people like that, people who deserve to be loved.
4. Don’t give everything to someone else, protect yourself
There are relationships in which you do everything for the person you love, so much so that you lose your own integrity and self-esteem. Don’t let them manipulate you, blackmail you, or act like emotional vampires. Love should be an equal exchange.
“I give to you freely because I know that you would do the same thing for me.” If you give but don’t receive anything and you’re not respected, you’ll get frustrated. It’s best to find someone who will love you without wanting anything in return.
5. The importance of personal space
You surely have your passions, hobbies, and past times, things you like to do with your friends or relatives. You should never give them up because others make you. Respect for personal space is essential for establishing a healthy relationship with a partner and it’s a must to be able to love without pain.
One thing is the space that’s shared between both partners, but everyone needs those moments of solitude to be alone or spend time with friends. You should keep in mind that if you “cut back” on personal space because of your partner, you lose part of your identity and this isn’t healthy.
But if the other person respects you and allows you to enjoy your personal space freely, they’re definitely worth it.
Remember that love isn’t a synonym of pain. Love is the maximum expression of happiness and the will to live. It’s an adventure that’s definitely worth the effort.
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