Stay with People who Appreciate You

For your own mental health, it is very important that you surround yourself with people that respect and accept you for your virtues and flaws, without trying to mold you to their own desires.

It’s not always easy to fit in in this complex world.

It’s even harder to find people who complement your rough edges, your empty spaces, and who support your values, being faithful companions throughout your entire life.

Stay with people who know the worst of you, and still help you to be better every day.  Stay with people who make you smile every morning when you open your eyes, banishing fears, worry, and unhappiness.

Although it might not seem too simple, the truth is there is always more than one person that is able to shine light on your dark moments.  People who know what they have, when they have it, and we’re not talking just about love relationships, either.

In life, we all need friends, family, and partners to respect and understand us.  Not only do we need to love ourselves and strengthen our own self-esteem every day, but we also need a good social network to surround us.

Stay with people who encourage you to be better

People who stop you from changing put up walls around your own personal growth.  No one is the example of absolute virtue, and there’s something very basic in human beings, which is their ability to overcome, and to learn every day, absorbing new lessons.

  • Let people who enrich you enter your life.  Let them guide you to promote your own personal growth.
  • To be better every day, you need to be aware of your mistakes and your limitations.  And you can only achieve this by being humble.
  • Stay with the person that, rather than judging, criticizing, or punishing you, is the example for how to behave.  This person guides you to face your fears, calms your anxiety, and helps you walk more confidently through life.

Stay with people who think of you as “indispensable” in their daily life

Stay with someone who knows what they have, when they have it 2

I’m sure you’ve heard that you need to “avoid attachments” or “avoid needing someone.”  But you need to look at this fairly objectively, because if one thing is sure, there are certain people in life that we need in order to be happy.

  • You need to know how to differentiate between needing to have people you love by your side, versus wanting to “make them” who you want them to be, limiting their freedom, their ability to choose, and their personal growth.
  • People that need you also should know how to respect you.  You are indispensable in a lot of people’s lives, but that means you need to offer respect and love without smothering them.  This type of love enriches.
  • Stay with people that show you you’re important to them every day; these people can make you happy without needing to impose, control, or mistrust you.

Stay with people who give you light on dark days

I’m sure that you, too, have someone in your family, or a friend, that whenever you go to them with a problem, rather than helping you all they do is bring up your mistakes that landed you in that difficult situation.

  • Some people are capable of simply further humiliating you, rather than giving you answers.  This is what you should avoid.  When something goes wrong in your life, choose wisely who you go to for support, even if it’s just to listen.
  • Some people will listen to you and respect you.  These personalities know how to show openness and empathy.
  • Stay with people that, rather than judging you, get close to you.  These people are capable of putting themselves in your shoes, so as to better understand you.
  • Don’t let the people go that are able to make you calm during dark days, and comfort you when you feel alone.

Stay with people who offer solid commitment, whose emotions don’t change overnight

Woman in the forest thinking about what she has in life

For some people, stability, respect, and commitment don’t have any purpose.  These people show all sorts of affection, love, and respect one day, and then the next all they show is indifference.

You could experience this not only with your partner, but with your family members as well.  They show unstable emotions and a lack of emotional maturity.

  • No one has the right to make you a thousand promises one day and then take them away the next, as if you had no feelings.  Undoubtedly, these are the most destructive and toxic relationships around, which is why you should limit contact with them and protect yourself.
  • Stay with people who exhibit emotional maturity and are stable in their affection, feelings, and words from day to day.
  • As people, we need security.  This is why you should surround yourself with people that don’t change their minds from day to day, who offer unwavering commitment and an explicit agreement that promises will be fulfilled, rather than lost.
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