Live in the Present, Not the Past

While the past may be hard to accept and to move forward from, you must do so in order to move ahead to a brighter future with more opportunities.
Don't live in the past

Even though we don’t believe it, we are not the same person we were yesterday.  The past has taught us, with its joy and its sorrows, to be wiser.

The past cannot be changed. No one can alter one iota of what has been done, what has been said or what has happened.

Nevertheless, what has happened to us in the past defines who we are now.

The past cannot be changed.  No one can alter one iota of what has been done, what has been said or what has happened.  Nevertheless, what has happened to us in the past defines who we are now.

There are some people who can’t come to terms with their own past.

This is because they still have open wounds from the mistakes that they have made and the failures they have experienced. This keeps them from being able to enjoy the here and now of today.

While it is good to accept the past, we also need to understand that one of our worst mistakes is destroying our present life by remembering our past which has no future to it.  We should put our past aside in spite of accepting each mistake made, everything or every person we have lost in our lives. This is not easy to accomplish but it can be done.

We suggest that you reflect on this.

The past has nothing new to offer you

At times the past does come back to haunt us.

This can occur in the form of people trying to hurt us by asking us to go back to the person we were yesterday. Today you are a new and improved person, you should not revert back to the person you once were.

Do not allow this. Each time that the past comes knocking at your door, understand that it has nothing to offer you. True happiness occurs at this very moment.

We suggest: Time erases nothing. It puts things in their place




It’s time to move ahead

Living is being able to move forward by detaching yourself from things and people.

You have left friends who turned out to be false and family members who didn’t appreciate you.  You have left places, jobs and customs and things in order to move ahead to new paths full of opportunities and happiness.

  • It’s time to start anew and close doors that hinder our growth.  Doing so is bittersweet.  However, when we “close doors” we should not harbor hate or frustration.
  • Understand that whoever truly would like to overcome their past should do it free of baggage. Hate is, without a doubt, the heaviest burden and makes us prisoners of those who did us harm, those who did not really love us.
  • Step ahead to a future free of resentment and of those negative emotions that erode your opportunity to be happy.

We also suggest: The 50’s, great years for women

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Love your present and integrate your past

You are a complete person. Each one of your past and present experiences makes up you. This is the you that you should love, understand and respect.

  • According to Gestalt therapy, that approach to human psychology reminds us that we should be aware of the here and now, while combining the past and the present.
  • The person who only recalls the past and longs for it forgets about the “present me.”  We tend to have a disconnect from reality and our own necessities.
  • Believe it or not, this can make us sick. Very often depression originates from a hopeless fixation on a time from the past. It is because of that weakness that we are unable to fully live in the present.

We should be capable of loving ourselves for who we are, including the mistakes we’ve make in the past. The mistakes have allowed us to learn and figure out who we are now.

You miss a thousand paths you could take by looking at the past

In spite of the fact that we have all lost and missed  many things in our past, the only way to repair those gaps is to create new opportunities and to focus on the here and now.  We can do this with more wisdom and bravery.

Something interesting that can help us reflect on this is to think about an ancestral Japanese technique that is used to repair broken pieces of China.

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  • The Japanese culture understands that when a cups breaks, for example, nothing can be like it was before. The past is gone and it defines who we are now.

Nevertheless, it also opens the door for us to be stronger and more beautiful than before.

  • Because of that, those fragments and broken pieces go back together using a technique called Kintsugi.  This method utilizes a type of glue that allows the repair to be covered with a gold or silver dust.
  • Each crack is decorated with the gold or silver paint which makes the piece more beautiful and tells a great story.
  • We should also put this technique into practice.  Far from avoiding or lamenting our past, we ought to integrate it into our present with strength and resilience.

Dare to paint your wounds with gold, don’t hide them, don’t be ashamed…

Also read: Dare to live the life that you want to tell about

You are not the same person who you were yesterday.  You are a braver, more capable person and someone who is respectable, moving ahead in search of more opportunities.