Love is a feeling that’s so intense that it sometimes gets out of control. It ends up being an obsession that sneaks up on us from behind.
It’s not easy to recognize when you’re trapped by obsession or when you really feel love.
Because of this, today we want to take a look at some fundamental differences between love and obsession. This helps us to make it clear and easier to see what’s happening to you.
Love or obsession?
The exclusive sickness
Something happens when you find yourself obsessed with another person. You build a wall around the relationship that there isn’t a way to work around it.
This exclusivity drowns you. This happens because most of the time you want to control everything. As a result, you find yourself full of doubts and alert instead of relaxed and enjoying the relationship.
Love, on the other hand, values honesty between the people in the relationship.
Obsession and self-esteem
When obsessions happen, it has something to do with a low self-esteem. We’re missing something. We need something that we don’t have. As a result, we become obsessed.
Don’t lose yourself: you don’t need anyone to complete you. You are a complete person.
But, when we talk about love, we aren’t talking about someone who fills us. Instead, we’re talking about someone who complements us.
There’s acceptance in love
The moment that a couple breaks up, there’s always a period of pain. You have to go through this. But sooner or later, you’ll accept the reality.
However, with obsessions, this isn’t the case. There’s pain, but we can’t let go. We stay trapped or tied. Many times, we may not reach acceptance if we don’t go to therapy.
The other person is a human being
This should be obvious. However, when we’re talking about obsessions, it isn’t as clear.
In these cases, the other person is like a piece of property. They’re something that belongs to you. This is so they can give you something that you’re missing.
In your heart, you think of them as being “obligated” and that you can’t live without them. Because of your need, they stop being a human being and become a possession.
When we talk about love, it has the other person in mind. They can enjoy their rights as much as their liberty.
The intention to manipulate
Sometimes, one partner develops a lack of interest in the other in a relationship.
If we’re talking about love, this makes you sad. But you end up making a decision and accepting the breakup.
However, in the other case, this isn’t something that happens. Rather, it’s used as a weapon against the other person.
Doing this, they try to make the other person feel guilty for this lack of interest.
The importance of communication
Communication and empathy are fundamental elements for every healthy couple. This helps everything run smoothly.
However, in relationships where obsession is present, communication is absent. Instead, there’s fear that the other person can escape, flee, or leave us.
Because of this, you make it seem like nothing’s wrong. You pretend that everything is going well so you don’t see the reality of the problem.
Have you ever experienced these two forms of “love” or believing that you love? People that become too obsessed in their relationships end up very hurt.
Their need don’t get met. If at any moment everything changes, they completely lose control.
They don’t allow anyone to change or become something different. They’ve given everything for the other person.
However, they’ve forgotten about themselves. Then, the only solution is to find themselves again.