5 Things You Should Stop Feeling Guilty About
When was the last time you felt guilty about something? Saying the wrong word, forgetting someone or treating them inappropriately are undoubtedly things that we have all done.
Having said that, we must bear in mind that feeling guilty is related to our moral conscience. It’s an indicator of our own personality and a reflection of our values, as well as our education.
Feeling guilty and remorse about something from time to time helps us to improve. It’s appropriate and necessary.
However, psychological and emotional well-being depends on balance. An excess of something is not good.
The accumulation of guilt that limits us and vetoes our personal freedom is no longer healthy or adequate. In fact, we’re sure that today you carry many guilt-related weights in your heart.
In today’s article, we aim to take these aspects into account. You should reflect on them to realize that, indeed, many of your daily actions are related to the feeling of guilt.
Reasons why you may start to feel guilty
1. Say “no” when you feel like it
Practicing assertiveness is essential for our self-esteem. Saying “no” when we need to is an act of personal courage that we should all put into practice.
- Refusing to do something is raising our walls for self-protection. Moreover, this act offers other people a type of relational information, which helps them understand where the boundaries in the relationship lie.
It’s necessary for us to begin to stop feeling guilty for saying “no” when it’s necessary.
2. Do what you want when you need to
We know it’s not easy. We understand that none of us has the total and absolute freedom to do what we please whenever we want to.
- However, within this “limitation” is self-negotiation.
- I deserve a free afternoon for myself. I deserve this little treat. I deserve to take care of myself, to pamper myself and to put myself first…
- Don’t hesitate to put this action into practice when your mind needs it. Set aside the crises of conscience you may be experiencing and allow yourself to have what you need without feeling guilty.
3. Freely express your opinion
You have a voice and have certain values and feelings. So, why should you feel guilty for expressing your opinion when the occasion arises?
- Well, we do this because we’re afraid to speak for fear of hurting other people and of presenting an image of ourselves that others do not expect. Furthermore, we’re afraid to let people down or even cause disappointment in telling the truth.
- We mustn’t fall into this destructive abyss dominated by guilt. The truth must always be said, but without causing damage which spurs from aggression.
- The truth that helps to understand and set personal limits is necessary.
Do it! Express what you think, what you feel and what does not seem right aloud. To be silent, to assume things and to hide things is an immature act that destroys us little by little.
4. Get away from someone who doesn’t make you feel good
This is undoubtedly one of the most problematic sources of guilt in our day to day life: low-quality social interactions.
- Although the term “toxic person” is used very often it’s in fact not necessary for a friend or family member to be “toxic” in order for them be unpleasant towards us.
- There are people who just don’t make us feel good and who we just don’t get along with. They’re not “bad people”: they just have personalities that are incompatible with our own.
Believe it or not, you’re not forced to get along with everyone. Don’t feel guilty if you choose to distance yourself from these people instead of being fakely polite to them.
5. Don’t feel guilty about not meeting your expectations
There’s no worse enemy than the mind itself. Sometimes we set such high expectations about what we should achieve that all we can do is suffer.
- We have all been through those times when we feel guilty for not giving the best of ourselves to others.
- We feel guilty about not getting that dream job or guilty about not losing all the weight we want. We’re slaves to an unhappiness that we ourselves have created.
- We must cut these insane ties and free ourselves from this prison. Don’t set yourself expectations that are too high. Fight for what you want, but first of all be humble and respect yourself as a person.
To conclude, feeling guilty can sometimes be necessary. This is because it helps us shape our moral conscience and helps us to improve in many ways.
However, when we become too obsessed with certain aspects such as the ones we’ve outlined above, we become unhappy and perhaps even depressed.
Don’t allow this to happen. Take responsibility, but grow by making good decisions, which allow you to be free and happy.