How to Recover a Relationship that Ended but Had a Future

Have you and your partner broken up but you still love them? If so, read these tips to recover a relationship that had a future.
How to Recover a Relationship that Ended but Had a Future
Isbelia Esther Farías López

Written and verified by the philosopher Isbelia Esther Farías López.

Last update: 09 October, 2022

Do you still have feelings for your ex? To recover a relationship that’s already ended is not an easy task. However, it’s worth making an effort to return if there are still feeling and you believe the relationship may have a future. The most important thing is the certainty that the love is there and you aren’t just doing this on a whim. 

Also, rebuilding a broken bond is a job that must be done with careful planning and not just with emotions. It means carefully considering the past to learn from what happened and being able to act differently. Otherwise, a breakup will just happen again.

Let’s take a closer look.

How to recover a relationship that ended without making the same mistakes

You must think about what you want carefully before getting back together with an ex so you don’t make the same mistakes.

Sometimes, separations or breakups provoke that imminent need to recover a relationship in any way. Then, one or both members of a relationship may make unhealthy decisions that eventually end up harming the relationship even more. Therefore, it’s necessary to bear in mind certain tips to avoid falling into the most common mistakes.

1. Some time apart is always healthy

Staying disconnected for a while is the best way to determine if you really miss each other. To do this right, there must be no meetings, no phone calls, and no visiting each other’s social networks. This may be difficult for some of the more intense people out there, but this is a very necessary and valuable step.

Not knowing anything about your ex-partner allows you to evaluate if you really need them in your life as much as you think you do. In the same way, it allows your partner to do the same. In addition, it also allows you to recognize their strengths and weaknesses better and gives you some time to miss them.

You might find this interesting: The 5 Most Common Reasons for Falling out of Love

2. Remember that a positive attitude generates positive responses

A woman leaping in joy
Happiness lies within, and it’s important to remember this before seeking to get back together with an ex.

Getting up every day with the best energy and the thought that everything is for the best really helps in these situations. It’s necessary to see the positive side of every situation and to understand why your breakup happened to begin with.

The reasons for the breakup may very well still be present, but far from seeing them as an impediment, you must see them as an opportunity to learn and grow. That is to say, the reasons for your breakup are opportunities to transform your mistakes into something healthy to incorporate into your lives. In fact, this is the moment to allow yourself to change what was causing problems in your relationship.

If you manage to be positive, there will be no arguments when you meet up again. Instead, there will be healthy dialogue. When there’s no reproach or blame, the goal is to become a person with new foundations and more happiness.

The love isn’t lost. You were just together in difficult circumstances, which means you now have the opportunity to learn and grow from them.

You might find this interesting: How to Identify Red Flags in a Relationship

3. Knowing yourself better gives another perspective

To recover a relationship, you have to be very aware of what you contributed to it and what you can provide it. Then, this time alone can also make it possible to better analyze the relationship.

Be very honest with yourself about what personality you adopted in the relationship and how this could have contributed to the breakup. Was there jealousy, emotional dependence, too much intensity, or bad moods? Did you let yourself be carried away by the routine without doing anything to make your partner feel special?

Before thinking about the fights or the actions of your ex, you first have to examine yourself. Imagine you were watching yourself in the past relationship as if you were watching a movie – neutrally and from a distance. Change your perspective and observe yourself from the outside.

To recover a relationship that had a future, you must first recovery your healthy sense of self.
To recover a relationship that had a future, you must first recovery your healthy sense of self.

4. Move forward with your own social life

During this new period of being single, you have to move forward with your personal and social life. Go out to events, have fun with friends, and do the activities you enjoy most. Staying active generates a good mood, and this is truly contagious.

If you meet your ex-partner somewhere, it’s a good time to say hello and show your best disposition to have a good time. Other people highly value self-confidence – sometimes much more than you may think!

5. Get back in contact again

When you already feel strong, positive, and confident that you want to recover a relationship, then you can initiate new contact. Start with a phone call or a private message and wait for a response. However, always do this without showing excessive anxiety or eagerness.

Your ex should see the person who they fell in love with and be reminded of why you were together in the first place. Bearing this in mind, your conversations should never focus on the problem of separation. That’s already part of the past and this should be made clear.

Restarting a relationship that ended

Now it’s about starting over, valuing everything that brought you together (and continues to do so), and, in turn, proposing solutions to improve the aspects that didn’t bring you both happiness. In the latter case, it’s important that the strategies are carried out as a team, as this can help strengthen your bond and make both of you feel comfortable.

Finally, it’s important that you’re very clear and that, when discussing your concerns, you’re willing to work together and make an effort to solve any conflicts that arise.

Would you like to recover a relationship that’s ended? If you think it has a future, it’s worth a try!

All cited sources were thoroughly reviewed by our team to ensure their quality, reliability, currency, and validity. The bibliography of this article was considered reliable and of academic or scientific accuracy.

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This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.