How many times have you wanted your kids to do something a certain way, but you don’t walk the talk?
If you don’t do what you’re asking of them, your lessons probably won’t get anywhere.
This is all the result of something that happens all the time in families: children pay attention to everything their parents do.
Therefore, being a good example is very important for avoiding arguments, confrontations, and problems.
Read this: 6 Mistakes That Destroy Family Relationships
Saying, “Don’t put your feet on the table” or “Put your clothes in the basket, not on the floor” is easy; being an example, though, is hard.
If a parent puts their feet on the table, the child won’t understand why they’re being told one thing while the one telling them is doing the exact opposite.
It’s then that the child will rebel and do the same as the parent. As a result, there will be heated conversations, arguments, tantrums, and some interesting statements…
For example, when a child points his finger at his parents: “Why can’t I put my feet on the table if you are?” one of the parents will respond with the famous, “because I said so.”
Do you really think that will work? This is a rather unfair sentence that frankly doesn’t make any sense. It also definitely won’t give you the results you want.
Even without realizing it, you might be the one causing fights in your home that can actually be easily avoided.
However, the responsibilities and things weighing on your mind sometimes complicate things and make it hard to see how simple they may be.
If your anger with your boss or frustration with your spouse has to come out some way or another. Who are you going to take it out on? The littlest one in your family, the one who doesn’t deserve it.
Don’t let this happen.
Incoherence: the adolescence time bomb
While they may start rebelling against incoherence in the family environment from the time they’re little, it all gets worse in adolescence.
That’s when patience is indispensable and the “because I said so” does not go over so well.
You can’t expect from others what you don’t do yourself. Being an example is the best way to raise your kids, not ordering or demanding them because you’re the parent.
Parents are people, and children are, too. Of course, the former has the authority, but they must learn to use it correctly.
If being an example isn’t something you consider a priority, you’ll be losing authority that you’ll try to get back by raising your voice, using threats, and causing arguments that will make your home a mess.
During adolescence, your kids need stability, understanding, and a lot of love, not screaming and senseless words.
Check this article out: Hyper Parenting: A Way to Give the World Unhappy Children
Don’t put them on the same level
When a parent gets mad, yells, and starts arguing with their child as if they were the same age, all authority is lost.
Being an example means not getting carried away by feelings that compel you to do it the easy way: raising your voice, ordering, and saying, “because I am your parent and you have to do what I say.”
Putting yourself on the same level as your kids will make the situation worse. However, to keep from doing that, you have to be a good example.
Your probably have all kinds of responsibilities, money problems, and concerns for your kids’ future. But never forget to show them how much you love them.
After all, what they sometimes see in the day-to-day is just senseless yelling and arguments. Where is the love then? Where is the understanding?
Before you go, don’t miss: Montessori Techniques that Can Help Handle Your Child’s Anger
If you work on being a better person every day and learning from your mistakes, then you’re on the right track.
Work on being the best version of yourself and your children will follow your lead naturally.