You’ve just had sex. Your partner is tired and lying down next to you looking satisfied. Everything went as planned – the both of you did everything possible to satisfy each other.
However, the person next to you just reached ecstasy but your experience was quite different. You didn’t enjoy it, but why?
The truth is that there’s no concrete answer. Sex is not the same for everyone. We’re not all looking for the same things.
However, in order for you to enjoy sex, there are two minimum requirements, aside from desire: knowing your body well and mutual trust.
In films like Kiki, Love to Love the flexibility of human sexuality is seen in an unprejudiced way. At the same time, it shows how communication is the fastest way to solve problems.
Sex can tell you what’s happening outside of the bedroom
Sex is the language we use to communicate everything that we cannot say. We can’t use words to express ourselves.
Therefore, sometimes we make the mistake of thinking of the bedroom as a place separate from the rest of the relationship. Wrong! This is a mistake in both stable and sporadic relationships.
Therefore, we suggest you consider the following reasons why sex may not be satisfying for you:
1. Lack of confidence
Think about a couple with one partner who’s intolerant, while the other is usually afraid to look bad.
In such an unequal relationship, proposing a change of plans for Saturday night will become a source of stress. The same thing will happen to this person when they want to suggest something new.
This lack of confidence can lead to problems in the bedroom.
2. Low self-esteem
On the other hand, it’s very important to have a healthy amount of self-esteem in order express what you want. When someone has low self-esteem, they blame themselves when sex hasn’t been satisfying.
In addition, they don’t have enough confidence to explain their situation freely.
If you’re like this, you should go to therapy or learn tricks to improve how you view yourself. It’s time to be honest and for your companion to help you in this process.
3. Your lover is selfish
Many people view sex as a way to satisfy themselves and forget about the pleasure of the other person.
For example, if they enjoy rough sex, then they’ll move in a way that pleasures them without caring about what the other person likes. Likewise, you’ll be ignored if you prefer sex that is less rough.
When you’re in a similar situation, try to take the reins and act as a sexual guide for your body. It’s usually stimulating and exciting.
If you’re willing to just let the other person take control and forget about your needs, perhaps it’s time for you to consider the meaning of your relationship.
4. Sex isn’t satisfying because of monotony
It’s funny, but knowing your partner very well can become a problem in bed. This is because sex becomes something predictable.
You know how your partner will start, where they’ll touch you, how they’ll do it, etc. This, which in other circumstance is an advantage, becomes a drawback.
For this reason, the ideal thing to do is to look for new positions, games, oils, etc. Basically, anything that introduces the surprise factor in this regard is good.
Don’t view this as a specific action, but as an attitude: curiosity is good in all areas of life, even in the bedroom.
Do you want to know more? Read: 6 Things You Should Discuss With Your Partner Every Day
5. Prejudices that make it difficult for you to enjoy sex
Culture, religion, and movies teach us when and how we should make love. Such conventions take root in our brains so that they prevent us from enjoying sex or other activities as we should.
Maybe it’s not happening to you but to your partner, or maybe it’s affecting both of you. The best thing is that you inform yourself well. Work your mind to convince yourself that sex is between the individuals that practice it, not between you and societal conventions.
Any stances and likes are valid, as long as the lovers do it of their own volition.
Sex is not satisfactory when there isn’t any communication. If you’re experiencing a lack of satisfaction in your sex life, it’s time to talk with your partner and fix it together.