3 Steps to Forget an Impossible Relationship

· November 23, 2016
Many times we fight with ourselves over an impossible relationship because of our own needs and the need to fill that void inside.

An impossible relationship can be very painful if you don’t know how to get past it. You start thinking that you’ll never be happy again. Obviously, forgetting an impossible relationship is easier said than done.

Even though it can be tough, when we have an impossible or toxic relationship, we need to figure out the reason we can’t let go of it.

On many occasions, we’re stubborn enough to not let go of the person we love. “If you want it, you have to go and get it” is the phrase that many use people to justify themselves.

However, with this we open a hole in our hearts that we’ll eventually have to close up again with difficulty. It’ll be very hard for us and we’ll end up ruining ourselves in our desire to have this person by our side.

Steps to forget an impossible relationship

1. Look inside yourself

A woman against a tree.

Sometimes, we forget to look inside ourselves to not have to face the problems and circumstances that this kind of obsession has brought us, the problems brought on by loving someone who doesn’t love us back.

Doing some soul-searching can help you discover that you’re perhaps emotionally dependent. That can get in the way of letting go of this person who you aren’t destined to be with.

Also, it’s possible that you’ll be surprised by some personal facet. For example, the need to get everything you decide to go after. Perhaps this comes from some negative situation in the past. This could be anything from an abandonment to a rebound relationship.

Read on: Three Fatal Errors at the End of a Relationship

It’s important that you find out if it’s habitual for you to fall in love with people who are out of your reach. If so, it could be that your self-esteem is doing this to you.

Sometimes, it’s also possible that we fall in love with people who we can never be in a relationship with because we’re not prepared to start a relationship.

Thus, you should definitely look inside yourself to discover what’s really happening.

2. Do you feel happy with yourself?

Painting of a man with his arms crossed.

When you take a look at yourself, you’ll be able to answer this very important question. This is because although many times we believe that we feel alright, we’re actually destroyed inside.

Perhaps we’re sad and we need to feel companionship. Or we’re simply people who like to be in love all of the time.

Make sure you aren’t looking for approval from someone else. Because of this, you might fall in the trap of an impossible relationship.

The hardest part of this is when this turns into a way of hurting ourselves. Some people self-destruct when they’re not happy with themselves.

It doesn’t have to be visible since they don’t have to physically harm themselves. Eating disorders and diving into toxic relationships are other ways to cause self-harm.

3. A new pain doesn’t take your mind off the old one

A woman and a table.

We’ve all gone through some kind of romantic disillusionment. Also, we’ve all heard the saying “A new pain takes your mind off the old one.” However, there’s nothing farther from the truth.

Discover: How to Move On Independently After a Breakup

Trying to forget someone with another person is just a way to hurt your new relationship. This affects both you and your new partner.

It’s true that it’s easy to ignore someone you were with once you’re with someone new. But don’t you feel that you’re not really in love? Don’t you realize that, in some way, you’re just manipulating the situation?

This phrase is also really significant. It references being single and the fear of not finding a new partner. Because of this, we desperately look for a new one.

However, it’s only a momentary comfort for your need to not be alone. And it’s a momentary relief for not having to face the world without a partner by your side.

Impossible relationships paralyze you

A painting of a woman and flowers.

An impossible relationship keeps you from being able to find a true, healthy relationship with someone. You stay tied to the relationship. On occasion, you’ll stay like that for a long time in hopes that something will happen. We’re talking about years.

Falling in love with someone like this will make you miss out on many opportunities. These opportunities will pass you by but you won’t be able to see them because you’re blinded.

It’s important that you remember that an impossible relationship will hurt you. It won’t start well and you’ll always feel disappointed.

If you constantly dive into this kind of desire, you need to open your eyes. Love yourself. Don’t grab on to an impossible relationship out of fear.