5 Ways to Stop Expecting Too Much of Others

· September 6, 2016
Expecting too much from others only leads to disappointment. Don't allow your happiness to depend on other people, it's your responsibility alone.

Expecting too much from other people instead of focusing on your own happiness can lead to disappointment. It isn’t wise to let yourself expect too much from others because you have no control over what they are or who they become. High expectations could lead to getting hurt.

You live your life surrounded by expectations, many of them unrealistic. When you’ve suffered enough disappointments, you realize that it’s time to change the way you look at others and stop expecting too much from them.

Let go of your high expectations

Waiting for things that will never happen leads to disappointment. Other’s behavior is completely out of your control, so expecting too much from those around you isn’t healthy. That being said, you should have high expectations for one person in particular: yourself.

woman smelling a flower

Today, we’d like to invite you to learn about 4 ways that can help you as you start letting go of your expectations. Following these strategies will set you free and allow you to drop your unrealistic expectations. It’s time to stop waiting, and start living.

1. Learn to distinguish expectations from dependency

You may not realize it, but you’ve probably blamed other people for your own unhappiness on many occasions. How you act influences your emotional state. You’re dependent on others because you’ve made them responsible for something that only you can be responsible for.

Read: Codependent Relationships: Bonds that Hurt


Happiness is impossible if you continually depend on other people in order to feel good. Learning to lighten up and letting go of your expectations will allow you to see that happiness is in your own hands and only you are responsible for it.

2. Accept that you won’t always get what you give

We’ve all heard that if we give something that we shouldn’t expect anything in return. However, most of us do anyway. In this instance, we’re expecting others to reciprocate what we do for them.

woman-drawing

This just puts you in a situation where your expectations come first. Accept other people as they are. After all, not everyone will be able to live up to your expectations. Don’t get upset. You should be happy with what you were willing to share, without any expectation of reciprocity.

3. Never idealize people or situations

It’s easy to get weighed down by expectations in certain relationships or situations. For example, in romantic relationships, we may view our partner as our ideal mate. We believe they are perfect and without flaws. This illusion changes over time, leading to huge disappointments.

Discover: My Problem Is Setting Expectations for Other People

Idealizing a circumstance or person blocks you from seeing that people change, and not always for the better. This will hurt, and you won’t realize that you’re responsible for your own pain. You cannot control anything or anyone. When you idealize, you believe in a dream that can never become reality.

4. We all have flaws, no one is perfect – stop expecting too much

Maybe you’ve never been on the other side of the table and you’ve never disappointed anyone before.  Or maybe someone was expecting a lot from you, but you didn’t meet their expectations, causing a huge disappointment.

woman with partner expecting too much

No one is perfect, so we need to accept ourselves as we are. What if we all started to accept instead of expecting something that may never come. This way, if someone does you wrong, you’ll be able to accept it because you didn’t have any expectations. Instead, you will be able to roll with the punches. You might even be surprised at your own ability to make the best of any situation.

Expecting too much from others is never a good thing. If you’re tired of being disappointed by other people changing their mind from one moment to the next or people being selfish, then stop expecting so much from them.

Don’t go without reading: Resentful People Never Forgive or Forget

The only person you should set expectations for is yourself. Accept others, never let yourself depend on others to be happy. Set yourself free from limiting attitudes that keep you from following your dreams. Quit expecting too much, and start living your life authentically.