Sleeping in Separate Rooms Can be Good for Your Relationship

Sleeping in separate rooms could be the solution to your problems as a couple. This is because our desire for our partner increases.
Sleeping in Separate Rooms Can be Good for Your Relationship

Last update: 22 November, 2018

If we told you sleeping in separate rooms could be good for your relationship with your partner, you’d probably say we’re crazy. But if you really start to think about it, it’s not as far-fetched an idea as it might sound.

It’s almost like there’s a clause in the contract you “sign” at the beginning of your relationship  that if you’re going to live together, you have to sleep in the same room as your partner.

Why does it have to be this way? What if people in a relationship start sleeping in separate rooms?

The idea of sleeping in separate rooms usually comes along with the idea that something’s not right, that there’s a problem in the relationship or that you no longer love your partner as much as you did before. For some reason, it just doesn’t seem like the right option, even if it feels like the right option.

So what’s the truth here?

The myth of sleeping in separate rooms being bad


Sleeping in separate rooms doesn’t necessarily mean that your relationship isn’t going well or that you don’t love your partner as much as you did before.

It may be true that this is the reason in some cases, but our theory is that this is because we’re all conditioned to think we have to sleep together, even when there are problems.

When a couple lives together for many years, each partner might start to wonder what has changed between them if they’ve lost their passion and have gotten stuck in their routines.

The answer lies in how you’ve been acting. It’s normal for you to you give your partner some space sooner or later if you’re always stuck to them at the beginning of your relationship.

It’s not uncommon to lose sexual desire for a partner. All of a sudden, you don’t have any more privacy—you don’t even close the door when you go to the bathroom.

That’s not necessarily always the case, though.

woman in lingerie

Sleeping in separate rooms allows each person in the relationship to have their own intimate space. It’s important to start to realize you don’t have to be with them at all times when you’re not at work or school.

So, why do we assume it’s such a bad thing to sleep apart?

Think about how you could benefit from sleeping in a separate room from your partner if you have a habit of reading or want to work late. You wouldn’t have to make sure that you didn’t wake your partner and would be free to go to bed whenever you wanted and keep the light on without worrying.

The erotic space

It’s rare for young couples to choose to stay in separate houses instead of living together. What it does is enable them to be independent and have their own space.

Having this separate space can also keep the passion from disappearing so quickly.

A safe distance can sustain the eroticism much better than always being with your partner. That’s part of why some young people choose to do this. This can also be a better option than sleeping in separate beds.

Does this mean that they never sleep together? Of course not. They might spend a weekend together or go on holiday together, but they prefer to live their daily lives separately, even if they’re in touch.

woman with lipstick on

Let’s not forget that routine and arguments, which we see as a normal part of everyday life, end up making a dent in the relationship.

Maybe this custom of living together isn’t always the best thing for a healthy relationship. At least not if you want to continue having privacy and your own erotic space.

Distance makes the heart grow fonder

You might not believe it, but sleeping in separate rooms can actually increase your sexual desire for your partner. Sometimes distance is a positive thing.

Plus, you’ve probably heard the saying “we all want we can’t have.” Well, if you sleep in separate rooms and aren’t as close together as usual, you’ll  see how your desire for your partner starts to increase.

This is an option to consider if you’ve lost the spark in your relationship after living together for many years.

The key is to not get carried away thinking about what’s right or wrong. We haven’t always been taught the right way to go about things, especially in relationships. So, you can give sleeping in separate rooms a try without worrying too much about that side of things.


You might like:

Long-Distance Relationships May Prevent Hugs, but Not Feelings

Remember that if your relationship has become filled with routine, the worst thing you can do is keep it that way. Sometimes it’s good to change up your habits and to try new things.

Sleeping in separate rooms could be a good way to do that.

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