Who hasn’t experienced the fear of not being a good mother?
Asking yourself these kinds of questions is normal. But don’t worry yourself too much, because your instinct will always provide you with the answers.
There are countless books and experts that will help you feel more secure about raising a child.
But…how did your grandmothers do it when all that information didn’t exist? The answer is simple. They were simply following their instincts.
Nature is wiseNature is wise, and if you listen to your instincts you’ll have no doubt what you should do. Societal beliefs and taboos have inserted themselves in the value of all this, however.
Think for a moment. When you hear your baby cry, what’s your first impulse? Do you ignore them or comfort them?
It’s true that a crying baby can become very annoying. This has a purpose, however, and no – we’re not talking about whether they have an upset stomach or gas.
We’re referring to the fact that sometimes a child feels lonely or uncomfortable about something. Being small doesn’t mean that they’re not aware of what’s happening around them.
Your instinct is wise, but your head will be filled with tips and advice from friends, relatives, or books.
For example, some people say that if you go to your child as soon as they cry, they won’t learn what it means to wait for their desires to be satisfied. Or it could mean that they’re trying to manipulate you.
Perhaps you should follow your instinct, while recognizing that your child is seeing or experiencing something that you are not able to see thanks to all the clutter in your mind.
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Mothers, slaves to the clockIs it true that mothers simply “know” they need to breastfeed their children every three hours? And who determined that it should be so?
Children aren’t allowed to demand the need to nurture themselves. After all, we eat at certain times, even when we aren’t hungry. What is we simply let our children eat when they’re hungry?
Without realizing it, you become enslaved to a schedule that doesn’t have to be that way. What happens if your child cries for food outside of that time frame? It will take a real effort not to give in. However, this also puts an end to your instinct.
You’ll have a lot of information, but that doesn’t mean you should accept it all as absolute truth. Every case is different.
It’s very difficult to let go of an ingrained belief, but it’s important if you want to learn to listen to your instincts, which are very wise.
Your instinct knows no guidelinesInstinct doesn’t know of any of those beliefs we’ve been talking about, although there are many others that aren’t fulfilled by animals in nature.
For example, many people advise breaking the habit of sleeping with your child and putting them in the crib instead. They claim that holding them in your arms all the time can cause them to get too accustomed to it.
All of this limits us from doing what is built inside us. If you stop being in touch with your child, they’ll start to notice.
The love of a mother is expressed in a way that knows no boundaries or rules. Don’t limit yourself or repress yourself. Nothing that you have been told is universally true.
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One way to eliminate all those beliefs is to think about what you liked or didn’t like about your own parents. That will help you be guided a little more by your instincts.
Of course, don’t fall into the trap of going to the opposite end of the spectrum, because as you know you can cause the same damage.
Search inside yourself, let your instincts guide you, and don’t hold back from showing your child love through hugs, physical contact, and concern whenever you want.