In Life, No One Helps You: It’s All About Your Effort
"I want you to be happy, but not more than me." This idea sums up what a "false friend" feels for us when they see us live the life we always dreamed of.
We live in a society that sometimes sees success without confidence. There are some who believe that your effort doesn’t determine your success in life. Some think that success is due to the influence of third parties. Sometimes, they’ll even say that it’s due to destiny or good luck.
It could be that this is true. It is possible that outside influences help some people move up without adequate competencies. However, talent does exist.
If you excel at something, it’s usually due to your hard work. It comes from your late nights, daily effort, sacrifices and your constant fight that leaves no room for surrender.
Because, as everyone knows, nothing is free. However, there are those who limit themselves to dreaming and hoping that “things will line up” due to a fluke in the universe.
Others, on the other hand, know that to reach a dream, there is only one magic formula: hard work.
We want you to think about that.
Everything you have is because of your effort
Writer Wally Lamb once said, “Destiny shuffles the cards, but we are the ones who must play the game.”
Those who think that their friends’ happiness, neighbor’s success of their own job is simply a coincidence are wrong.
They are so wrong that some try to find self-satisfying excuses. They do this to hide the evidence: they are bothered by seeing others happier than they are.
It can definitely be shocking. However, this reality hides an interesting psychological process. Later, we’ll explain some important aspects of success, overcoming difficulty, and envy.
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The double-edged sword of a distant happiness
“I want you to be happy, but not happier than I am.” This idea sums up what a “false friend” feels for us when they see us live the life we always dreamed of.
If you have ever noticed one of your acquaintances makes you feel like this, it’s important to know why.
- There are those who need to have a certain control over their close circle. This control is also based on an equality of conditions. If someone escapes this balance, they are questioned and rejected.
- This need for control really hides low self-esteem. They think, “If everyone I keep around me is as bad as I am, my incompetence won’t stand out.” There is an inequality of conditions.
So, the moment this person sees that your work equal or greater to theirs in some respect, they feel like they are being beaten.
Perseverance always pays off: ignore those who say otherwise
“Why do you want to apply for a job there? It’s all a sham and the only people who get in are the ones who have good connections!” “Why did you fall in love with him? He’s way too good for you, you’re wasting your time!”
We’ve all heard phrases like these from time to time. They may change depending on the location, the context, and the people speaking. But the idea stays the same: They want to strip you of your wings and kill your dreams, so they keep you from being happier than they are.
It’s clear that we need to be realists given that, at times, we build houses of cards on clouds of cotton.
However, when our goal is clear, logical, and possible, we need to do everything we can to make it happen.
Daily effort is a reflection of perseverance. Those who don’t invest their time, emotions, dreams and every fiber of their being won’t achieve their goals.
This is due to something we’ve already seen. In life, nobody gives anything for free.
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Never surrender and make your effort worthwhile
Along with perseverance and daily effort, there is an unyielding attitude: not surrendering.
Anyone longing to reach a goal doesn’t just work or put in the time. At the same time, they must face many outside factors.
These aren’t just the false friends we talked about before, the “dream killers.” They are barriers put up by society and its structures, back doors, filters, walls… And, of course, the same tricks we always come across.
You need to stand strong. When you see that you are able to achieve something, you should fight for it. Brave the rough seas in which not everyone stays afloat. Because, sometimes, it’s just not enough to have talent.
Sometimes, you need to have valiant courage and a noble, strong, unwavering mind. Only then can we achieve the success that we deserve.