What to Do if You're in an Unhappy Relationship

It may be difficult, but if you're in an unhappy relationship, ask yourself some questions to see if it's worth continuing
What to Do if You're in an Unhappy Relationship

Last update: 27 May, 2022

Sometimes we think,”I’m not happy in my relationship,” when what we really need to do is figure out what we’re doing wrong in an unhappy relationship.

Maybe we’ve forgotten that relationships take work. Love alone isn’t enough to keep going. Importantly, relationships need considerable amounts of effort.

Unhappiness sometimes comes over you when you’re in a relationship. However, instead of getting upset or panicking, stop and really look at what’s going on.

The real reasons I’m not happy in my relationship

Unhappy relationship

There are many reasons you may not be happy in your relationship. Maybe the passion is gone. On the other hand, perhaps there was infidelity, or possibly it was that argument where you felt disrespected.

However, there are some reasons you may not pay attention to. This may be because they go much deeper and require a more thorough analysis.

Let’s look at a few of them.

1. You don’t admit that you’re harboring a grudge

If he’s been unfaithful, you may have forgiven him, but inside you’re deceiving yourself. You haven’t completely forgiven him; there’s still resentment.

This may be why you’re not happy in your relationship. For that reason and more, the way forward is to accept that this is what you’re feeling.

Are you angry? Are you feeling resentful? You don’t have to deceive yourself. It’s better to accept your feelings.

2. You don’t want to admit that you don’t handle conflict well

Conflict in a relationship

There are always differences in relationships that lead to arguments and conflict. However, it doesn’t have to be a problem as long as you know how to manage them properly.

Do you listen to the other person? Or do you always need to be right? Do you throw their past back in their face? All of this could be a reason you’re in an unhappy relationship.

Learning to be assertive is important in a relationship. However, you should always respect the other person when giving your opinion about something or working something out.

The essential part is that, at the end, an agreement is reached between both parties.

You should never “sleep on it.” Resolve the problem as soon as possible; don’t put it off. This way, you’ll put the conflict in the past and your relationship will actually be strengthened.

3. The passion has dried up

Sometimes, we forget how important sex is and that it influences the health of our relationship. However, there are times when the passion disappears and we don’t know why.

That’s when it’s time to take a look at how communication is going in your relationship.

Are you expressing what you want? Similarly, are you able to enjoy sex or do you see it as an obligation? Are you taking time out for it or prioritizing other things?

Passion needs to be cultivated, too. Not touching each other, not showing affection, no longer letting the other know you care… all of this can make passion disappear.

If you don’t know how to fix the problem by yourself, seeing a couples counselor or sex therapist can be a very positive help. It will help greatly.

4. You can’t accept that things may be over

The end of a relationship

When you’ve been in an unhappy relationship for years, it may be that you’re unwilling to end it. In reality, this may mean you’re with someone you shouldn’t be and may even be feeling the weight of a past infidelity.

Sometimes, we lack the courage to say “enough” and put an end to a relationship when love is gone and you aren’t happy together.

However, being sincere and honest is much better than putting on an act that may lead to a catastrophic end where everyone ends up hurt.

When one half of a relationship is unhappy with it, it’s important to figure out if the issue can be resolved or if it’s time to break up. In order to do that, you have to stop deceiving yourself and start being honest with yourself and with the other person.

In a relationship, both people should be happy. If you are in an unhappy relationship, isn’t time to find a solution?


This text is provided for informational purposes only and does not replace consultation with a professional. If in doubt, consult your specialist.