I Loved You Then, but I Don’t Love You Now

· July 26, 2016
It’s important to know how to keep a relationship alive but you also need to know how to end it when the love is gone. It’s a painful, but necessary, way to prevent needless suffering

A relationship must remain in constant motion, just like fish swimming in the ocean. They are constantly moving, jumping, diving…but when they stop their movement they die. If you’ve reached this point it’s time to say: I loved you but I no longer love you now.

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Heartbreak is probably one of the most painful things that you can go through in life. It can be so complicated that in some cases, it’s hard to let go of a person who has been very special to you.

We’re programmed to establish bonds

Humans are designed to establish connections between each other: your family, your friends, your partners, your children…that’s why it’s so painful when these bonds break one day, especially when you may have no other option.

2 sorrowBut there’s something that people constantly forget: relationships are alive. This means that they must change, and it’s not always for the better. A new person may come into your life and change the way you view things. All this can have consequences.

So when the time comes that you have to say “I don’t love you anymore,” the pain, anger, disappointment, and feelings of abandonment will appear. You feel small, hurt. Something that you believed in has been broken.

Nevertheless, sometimes ending a relationship that has already reached an unbearable situation can be a positive thing. You fight until you can’t stand it anymore, until your suffering is so great the only thing you can do is to try to escape.

The broken heart

To feel as if your heart is breaking is one of the most common metaphors used to describe the pain of a breakup. This physical and emotional pain can cause great sadness, causing you to lose interest in most things in your life.

3 woman and heart
Why is this feeling so common? Why does a breakup also break your heart? It’s because you aren’t able to distinguish between being in love, and love itself. While many people confuse the two, they are very far apart.

The former refers to an attraction and desire that can make you feel those familiar butterflies in your stomach. But when they fly away, it’s time to reevaluate your situation. Has love escaped your grasp?

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Sometimes this can result in confusion, as you find yourself next to a person who you no longer love. Your infatuation was temporary, but it made you feel alive. When it passes, the feeling that “I don’t love you anymore” becomes stronger and stronger.

Saying “I don’t love you anymore”

4 broken heart
Telling some one that you no longer love them is difficult and complicated because you know how negatively your partner will react. In spite of this, the best thing you can do is be clear and honest. It’s not easy, but it is necessary.

You must be able to do this face to face, and express yourself in a clear, concise, and focused way to avoid confusing your partner. This will help you avoid many other problems.

Typically there will be an argument, an evaluation, and other reactions that will exacerbate the anger and disappointment that you feel. But don’t respond that way – your partner is hurting and you must understand their emotions.

Saying “I don’t love you anymore” takes courage, and you still must be able to empathize with your partner. Don’t be afraid, and strive to find the kindest way you can share your views on the relationship. This is how you show your understanding and make it clear why you can no longer be together.

Have you ever had to go through this hard time and say “I no longer love you?” It’s a complicated situation for both partners, so before you do it you need to go through a period of deep reflection.

Still, don’t wait too long to communicate your decision to your partner, because the longer you take the harder it will be. The important things must be said as early as possible and without hesitation. This will help you avoid causing even more damage.