How to Know if A Person With a Partner Likes You

If you think that a person who already has a partner likes you, you should analyze the pros and cons before making any decision, as this is a very delicate situation.
How to Know if A Person With a Partner Likes You
Bernardo Peña

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Bernardo Peña.

Last update: 11 June, 2022

Do you think a person with a partner might like you? In general, this is usually a complicated experience, especially when you’re also attracted to them.

In these cases, it’s important to assess a number of issues. You may be rushing into things, you may not even really like her and what you’re really attracted to is the “forbidden” nature of the relationship. On the other hand, you may be misinterpreting the signs you perceive.

The problem is that you may not be clear if his or her behaviors are a simple courtesy, if you’re getting confused, or if there really is chemistry between you. Therefore, in today’s article, we’ll some tried and true signs that could indicate that a person with a partner is attracted to you. Keep reading to learn all about them.

Signs that a person with a partner likes you

1. She or he looks at you differently

Chicas y chico mirándose a los ojos
The way we look at another person changes when we’re attracted to them.

When there’s attraction involved, the way a person looks at you changes. Therefore, if she or he is interested in you, that person will stare at you and won’t miss a single opportunity to observe you.

This action can be voluntary or unconscious. Sometimes, even if she or he tries to avoid it, that person may not be able to stop looking at you when you pass by them or you are near. This is one sign they may like you.

We think you may also enjoy reading this article: Should You Save Your Relationship by Ignoring Infidelity?

2. She or he wants to keep you close

If there’s already a friendship between you, that person will try to keep you close. In fact, it’s possible to notice this because she or he does not behave the same way with you as they do with their other friends.

Often, that person may show some interest without having much physical contact in order to determine what possibilities she or he has with you, even if you know that she or he is committed to another person.

3. She or he tells you his most intimate things

You’re aware that he talks to you too much even though he has a partner. Or perhaps she shares many of her dreams and secrets with you. During the day, you both keep in touch and tell each other what you’re doing or where you are going.

If she or he shows interest in constantly knowing what you’re doing or what has happened to you during the day, maybe this person’s feelings for you go beyond a simple friendship.

4. The person with a partner compares their partner with you

No one likes to be compared; that’s a fact. However, when the other person starts comparing their partner to you, they may be indirectly telling you how much they like you.

It may be common for them to tell you that it would be nice if their current partner was more like you or had many of your qualities. In fact, she or he may even go so far as to state that they think of you when they have a conflict in their relationship.

5. She or he asks you out

It’s normal that, as friends, you want to share moments together. However, what’s not so normal is her insistence on inviting you to do intimate things that she could do with her partner.

For instance, instead of going to the movies with his or her partner, they suggest you. Or, instead of telling her partner to go to an exhibition together, she asks you. She or he may almost always suggest that you do activities alone (just the two of you) and tries to avoid mentioning the person he is dating.

We think you may be interested in reading this, too: What Do Couples Who Have Survived Sexual Infidelity Have In Common?

6. The person with a partner gets jealous when you go out with someone else

If you talk to that person all day, even if there’s nothing concrete you’re talking about, it’s likely that at some point you show jealousy or a certain interest if you meet someone else.

For example, if you tell him or her that you’re going out with someone else, he or she changes his or her attitude or reproaches you. Sometimes, she or he may even suggest that you don’t do it because they think it’s not good for you. This isn’t just a sign they may like you, but also a sign that they have a controlling personality.

7. The person with a partner calls you when they’re upset with their partner

This may make you feel like “second fiddle”; however, it may be common for this person to come to you when he or she is going through a crisis with his or her current partner.

The confidence he has to talk to you about it actually may come with a hidden intention: to know if she or he has a chance with you in case his or her current relationship ends.

Mujer hablando por teléfono contenta
If a person with a partner calls you every time they have a conflict with their partner, it may be because they’re trying to determine if they have a chance with you.

8. They try to be in your social circle

Do you notice that you run into them everywhere when you go out with your friends? Do you coincide in different places? Maybe this is not just a coincidence.

If that person is attracted to you, she or he will look for a thousand and one excuses to see you. By being in your social circle, he/she is more likely to get closer to you.

Don’t accept crumbs from a person with a partner

If you already know how he/she feels about you and it’s reciprocal, it may be time to act and talk to that person. Perhaps as a result of knowing how you feel, he/she will venture to break up with his/her partner and you will start to get to know each other better. However, keep in mind that sometimes there are people who just like to flirt.

Be careful. Don’t lose your dignity and self-respect just because of a smile or a look. Try to analyze the situation very well before making any kind of decision. Remember that it’s very complicated to be in the middle of another commitment.



  • Houston, T. L. (1974), Foundations of interpersonal attraction, Nueva York: Academic Press.
  • Walster, E. (1971), Passionate love. In B. Murstein (Ed.), Theories of attraction and love. Nueva York: Springer Publ.