5 Traits of Irresistible People: Are You One?

February 8, 2019
Irresistible people have problems just like everyone else, but they know how to confront them with a smile and a positive attitude This positivity spreads to all who surround them.

We’re all familiar with what irresistible people are like and how they make us feel. They have something: some charisma or charm that goes well beyond physical appearance.

You may at first think that someone is born with this ability to attract others and that their attractive qualities come naturally to them.

But that’s not how it is. In these days of “coaches” and gurus capable of guiding you in numerous fields to better succeed in your daily life, it’s become clear that being irresistible is directly related to emotional intelligence.

We need to state clearly that this quality has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. There are influencing factors that are profound, interesting and go way beyond a face or a body.

We’re talking about how we interact with, treat, and even inspire others.

In this article, we’re going to go over some characteristics that define these kinds of people.

1. Irresistible people know how to connect with others

A person with rainbow light in their hands.

Travis Bradbery is one of the authors who has sold the most books about emotional intelligence.

All of his writing has a concrete purpose: teach people various abilities so they can feel more successful and happy.

You might also think that irresistible people are able to connect with others because they have an inexplicable “something” that lets them.

This “something” is actually a series of characteristics that can be learned. They are:

  • Empathy. They value the person they are speaking to.
  • Irresistible people are emotionally open and treat people with warmth.
  • They transmit confidence and security.
  • They are able to make the person they are with feel special.

2. They understand dignity and respect

Irresistible people can have a sort of wild charm.

Irresistible people attract others because they treat those around them with the same respect as they have for themselves.

  • They don’t expose vulnerabilities, intimidate, put up walls, or use the selfish language of sarcasm.
  • At the same time, they understand that everyone needs to be treated with dignity. When there is respect, people “blossom” and offer the best of themselves.
  • We’ve all noticed it at one time or another. When someone treats us well and values us, it motivates us to give our best. It gives us strength.

3. Respect others’ boundaries

There is something that we like to see in others: knowing how to respect the time and private space of others, understanding everyone’s personal boundaries and being conscious of them.

  • There are those who feel they have the right to interfere in our affairs, ask for favors and invade the space where each one of us cares for our self-esteem and inner balance.
  • Irresistible people, however, protect, defend and respect you. They will never get angry if one day you say “no, I don’t feel like going out today” or “I don’t share your opinion.”

They know how to show an invisible respect without words that fills a relationship with harmony in which we feel supported, valued and even protected.

Also read With Time We Learn to Love More, but Fewer People

4. They have a positive outlook on life

A woman with a butterfly in her hands.

  • When we say positive, sometimes it’s a double-edged sword. There are people who are unrealistically positive and think that things work out on their own, or that good things happen if you wish hard enough.
  • On the other hand, irresistible people understand that life is about struggle, effort and overcoming obstacles.
  • Everything they do shows a positive attitude that is fed by hope, courage and enthusiasm. 

Their energy and vitality is contagious.

We also suggest reading: 7 Keys to Resilience: Courage Comes from Within

5. They’re like a lighthouse in a storm

They give others encouragement, positivity, and motivation. Irresistible people make the difficult seem easy and have a humble heart that soothes us without asking for anything in return.

  • To be a lighthouse in a storm takes will, above all.
    It also means being willing to see possibilities where others only see problems, courage to break boundaries, and the desire to do the best for the common good so that everyone wins and no one loses.
  • It’s not easy. It’s not at all simple to have an attitude about life in which one recognizes him or herself in others to bring about this common good. Yet this tolerance of others is deeply needed these days.
  • Being irresistible may be a big challenge in our daily lives, but it’s worth putting into practice.
    To do this, start by caring for yourself and following this personal growth that little by little lets us offer our best to others by being happy ourselves.

When one is satisfied with one’s self and is happy, it’s clear to others. That’s when this magic is contagious and one becomes irresistible to others.

Bradberry, T. R., & Su, L. D. (2006). Ability-versus skill-based assessment of emotional intelligence. Psicothema. https://doi.org/10.1038/sj.hdy.6800514

Bradberry, T. (2014). 9 Things Emotionally Intelligent People Won’t Do. Forbes.

Bradberry, T. (2015). Are You Emotionally Intelligent? Here’s How to Know for Sure. Entrepreneur.

Mayer, J., & Salovey, P. (1997). What is Emotional Intelligence? In Emotional Development and Emotional Intelligence. https://doi.org/10.1177/1066480710387486

Mayer, J. D., Roberts, R. D., & Barsade, S. G. (2008). Human Abilities: Emotional Intelligence. Annual Review of Psychology. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev.psych.59.103006.093646