These are tough times for couples. Family life is becoming more and more complex, work is becoming more and more absorbing, and there are wide differences between how you were raised and who you are today, or what you expected and what you’ve found.
Every day is both a challenge and an opportunity to improve yourself as well as your relationship.
Although it’s true that every couple is distinct, it’s also true that most of them are seeking a happy home and the peace of being who they are. That’s where the curtains can be lowered and no one needs to pretend to play a role.
This safe daily existence, however, needs to be nuanced by attention to each other and by making them feel like they are your priority.
This is something that’s so essential, your partner might spend hours or days of their life preparing a surprise for you that’s just intended to make you feel special.
In spite of their list of things to do, their obligations, and their responsibilities, this says, “I’m thinking of you because you’re more important than anything else.”
Because we’re aware of how hard it is to combine these two things, we want to give you some tips for preserving your relationship with your partner.
5 tips for preserving your relationship
1. Talk to each other, and not on the phoneThis might seem obvious, but it’s more fundamental than that. It’s not just a matter of talking about mundane or routine issues.
Rather, we mean that you should talk about the issues that worry you or fill you with happiness.
You both need to know where the other stands at every moment and there’s nothing like a good conversation to find out. Don’t wait for a special occasion: lunch or dinner is ideal. Anytime is good.
Don’t forget to turn off your cellphone and use all five of your senses to listen and understand. It’s much easier this way.
See also: Signs of being in a toxic relationship
2. Bring back the kiss
With a kiss you can communicate everything that you feel without a single word. You deliver your intimacy with your lips. But as time goes by, people tend to set this aside.
What that does is banish a moment of mutual surrender. In another aspect, it’s the start of a sexual relationship, something that’s essential to maintaining your partnership.
Just like a kiss, sex is a space of unimaginably deep dialogue and because it’s based on pleasure, could you hope for anything more?
3. Do things togetherThe ideal activity is to start doing something that neither of you are familiar with but you’re both interested in it. The process of learning and discovery will amuse you and bring you together.
It will also help you escape from the routine and obligations. Without those, you’re more free and willing to enjoy something new.
In this way, you become better company for your partner because you’re positive and optimistic. This puts you in the position to give the best of yourself.
4. Don’t turn your back on your personal lifeTo be part of a couple means sharing yourself, and to do that you need to develop yourself. What does that mean? You have to preserve who you are.
Keep doing your favorite activities and take care of your friends. Go out with them on your own.
This way you’ll avoid that strange feeling of not knowing where things start or stop, because when that happens everything starts to fade away.
In another sense, having a story to tell when you get home is an essential component of maintaining your relationship.
It can strike up a conversation that will lead to another, so your relationship becomes more fluid, free, and natural when you’re together.
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5. Pay attention to the details
Most of the time you probably think about the utilitarian purpose of things, what’s practical. This can lead you to postpone progress, which is a mistake.
You don’t need to buy expensive gifts: you can write a letter, a poem, pick some flowers, or build something with your own hands…
The key is that your partner receives the following message: “With this I want you to be happy.” It might seem untrue, but giving up your time for love today is very valuable indeed.
The goal, therefore, is to enrich your communication with your partner. But always do this as yourself.
Never forget who you are because only then can you love another with the honesty and attention that they deserve.
When you don’t do this, you’ll be filled with negative thoughts that sabotage your relationship, even if they are never spoken aloud.